mario wanted poster

The Mushroom Kingdom is alive with parade music and joyous applaud. Every toad from around the area has come to pay witness to the hero’s return. The crowds are massive and seems as though their very presence might cause the ground beneath them to crumble.

A young toad is eagerly attempting to make his way through the crowd in anticipation of witnessing a once in a life time event. The shuffling of feet from onlookers causes the young toad to rethink his advances. It seems like every time he gets closer, he is outmatched by a much larger adult.

A class mate of his mocks the young toad as he is able to shove his way further towards the end of the crowd. The young toad gives up hope just before he is taken by the arm and hoisted above everyone. His father, who was worried that his son had gotten lost, lifts the young toad to the top of his large head and situates the child for a perfect view of the events.

The class mate looks up in envy has he is pushed further and further away.

Hope is in this young toad’s eyes. Hope that maybe the world is not so terrifying, as long as heros are around to right wrongs.

Trumpets sound and deafening screams erupt within the kingdom as a beautiful convertible vehicle approaches. It’s too far away for the young toad to see what it is, but he can feel the energy. He begins to straighten up and wobble around, much to his father’s displeasure. He needs to see him. Just once.

The vehicle comes into range and his eyes open wider then ever before. He saw the same red hat from the stories, and the blue overalls! It was the hero of the Mushroom Kingdom! It was Mario!

Mario was sitting where the mayor had told him to sit, waving the way he was told to wave, and smiling….because that’s what heros do when they return.

He couldn’t hear himself think over all the noise that he heard. It was far too real for him to handle. His hands began to shake before the princess took notice and slowly placed her hand on his other hand.

The horrific screams of fallen enemies slowly retreated from his mind and was instead replaced by joyous laughter and yelling. He turned to her, gave her a gental nod that said, “It’s ok. I will be ok.”

In between the waving and smiling, she leaned over and ask him if he was ok.

Rage filled his heart. What the hell does she mean!? No I’m not ok! Does she even care!? Royal stuck up princess! I’m a murderer! I’m a killer! How do I sleep after the things I’ve done!?

He smiled, looked her in the eyes and said, “Lets a go….”

This is part 2 of my on going series where I take a deep look into the legend that is Mario and attempt to expose him as the most dangerous character that video games have ever created. If you want to catch up on his tragic downfall, check out my first post


All of the deaths/murders/suicides are bosses pulled from a fan site does not take into account the endless number of goombas, koopas, shy guys, and Yoshis that he has murdered.

We will only focus on the more popular cannon since it is common knowledge that the Mario games are part of the Multiverse theory. Though there is a ton of murder in the other titles as well.  

I am also not going to talk about Super Mario Odyessy because it is a recent release and I do not want to spoil the game. 


Super Mario Land

All is well within the Mushroom Kingdom. It had been a year since the parade and Mario had become very uneasy.

He would work all hours of the day and party most of the night. Luigi, his brother, would be partying right along side him. They became inseparable lately and everyone just assumed that you could not have one without the other.

It’s said that they had a falling out just days after the parade. They faught constantly and actually ended up in the hospital on different occasions. It wasn’t after Luigi was able to get Mario back to work that he began calming down. Turns out Mario just needed an outlet.

Now that he was occupied, they had become better then ever. It wasn’t uncommon to see the brothers wobbling from one bar to the other with different ladies every night.

Life was good for awhile, until Mario received a random letter.

The letter did not say who it was from, but it did offer him a chance at some very lucrative work. Apparently, someone had kidnapped a different princess and this random person wanted him to save her. Still drunk from the night before, Mario had a good laugh at the fact that princesses are constantly getting kidnapped. He grabbed the bottle of whiskey from the end of the table and proceeded to get a handle on this heavy pounding in his head.


He studied the letter time and time again. Every time he read it, he heard the cheers and applauds from some time ago. Sure, people knew his name, but he didn’t want the cheers to die out. He wanted to matter.

There was no contact information in the letter. The only thing that gave Mario a clue as to where he should start his search was a plane ticket to Sarasaland and a picture of the beautiful Princess Daisy.


Mario finished off the bottle, grabbed his hat from beneath the body of…Jamie….Jennifer…Jessica…and walked right out the door.




Mario encountered many different enemies during his adventure. Each one more terrifying and weird then the last. Being in the land of Sarasaland, Mario felt like the same rules didn’t apply. Before, when he was fighting his way through the Mushroom Kingdom, he was essentially fighting in his back yard. He felt a sense of horror that his actions against his enemies would be looked at with shame by his neighbors.

But, in this foreign land, the gloves came off.

Mario would take on kings and dragons in his pursuit of Princess Daisy. Each scrape, each bruise, each broken bone that he suffered would just add fuel to the fire. He became numb to the pain. In a way, he enjoyed it. It gave him hope that he could once again feel something.

super mario land

While in Sarasaland, Mario killed:

  • King Totomesu (killed by pressing a switch, detonating a charge that killed not only the king, but all of his followers that were in the room)
  • Dragonzamasu (similar switch)(if it works, don’t fix it)
  • Tamao (killed when Dragonzamasu died. believed to be some type of psychological bond)
  • Hiyoihi (pressing a detonation switch)
  • Bikinton (gets a little more creative with his explosions. Actually kills him with torpedoes)


Mario stood on the banks of the ocean as he watched the last bits of Bikinton wash upon the shores. Though hours had passed since his triumph, Mario was still breathing pretty heavy. His cloths were torn, bandages were soaked with blood that may or may not be his own. His eyes were fixed on the horizon as the sun slowly descended into darkness. A smile creeped across his face as a single tear ran down his cheek. Right as the sun finally descends past the horizon, Mario receives a call from Luigi. Turns out that his adventures had made their way to the Mushroom Kingdom. Bystanders of  Sarasaland had been following and filming Mario’s different battles. News outlets across the kingdoms had filled the airwaves with constant loops of Mario’s brutal encounters. Many saw him as the hero that we all knew and loved, but others began to question his intentions. Luigi told him that there was a group of activists that gathered and began protesting Mario’s involvement in foreign affairs. Videos were posted of hate filled signs being shoved up against the gates of Peach’s castle demanding intervention.

Mario couldn’t believe what he was hearing. How could they turn on me like this!? Ungrateful little pricks! It’s a me! Mario!

Luigi sensed the long pause on the phone and attempted to reassure him. He told him that he should just stay in Sarasaland for a little while and wait this whole thing out. There was a longer pause this time before Mario agreed, thanked his brother, wished him all the best, and then hung up the phone.

evil mario

Rage was building to levels that Mario had never faced before. He continued to stare out into the vast oceans for what seemed like decades. A piece of rubble washed up and tapped him on his leg. As he looked down at the side of the torpedo, he noticed a trace amount of blood. The screams came rolling back into his head. He winced and immediately shuffled back. Mario let out a massive scream and threw his phone into the ocean. I don’t need them….


Saving Daisy would prove to be pretty lucrative for Mario. Turns out, princesses have a ton of money! For saving her, and the kingdom, Daisy offers Mario his very own castle within the realm. Mario would live like a king while he waited for things to die down. His castle was large and offered many advantages that was not afforded to him in the Mushroom Kingdom. He would not get many visitors while in Sarasaland, which was fine, he wanted to be left alone. He sat in his giant castle, all alone, holding onto a bottle of whiskey, the screams fading further and further away as he stared into flames, and the news casters relived his bravery before his eyes.


So…what do you think? Do you think that Mario is the hero or the villain? Are you enjoying this deeper look into Mario’s mental state as he is constantly pulled towards violence? Let me know!



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